Hello, Pressence

"Truth will set you free," we know these words. I've had that as a signature in the LU forum since the beginning. Only recently did I change it to "Truth recognized will set you free". And here is why: Truth can not do anything if it is not consciously recognized and lived. If one is not receptive to it, no words of truth can do anything. You can be bombarded with truth all day long and it will not touch anything in you if there is no openness and no fertile ground for it to land.

So what is this truth that has the power to set you free? It's Presence.

We are aware, we are conscious, we can feel that we know. We can be still and feel that there is this spacious sense of presence. Here now, always available to be noticed, recognized consciously. This presence has a tone, a flavor; it's rich and full of aliveness.

The problem that one may have is how to still the mind to the point of being able to rest in a thoughtless space. There are many ways to practice that, meditation being the main exercise. You can also use technology, or whatever that works for you. The mind filled with fears and anxieties, shame, guilt and regret can not be still. It keeps working on trying to resolve and explain, protect a person. The mind can not relax until it thinks that it is its job to keep everything in control and in a certain way. It can not just sit still if it thinks that it needs to perform tasks and figure a way out of problems. But the only real function of the mind is to be aware! To be aware. The end. Let this sink.

The mind is doing work that is really not its work. Creating and solving problems is tension in itself, especially when problems seem to have no solutions. The tension builds up to the point of collapse or explosion. Neither are joyful experiences. Only calm, peaceful mind can get to stillness. Only when it's no longer pressuring itself into performing tasks that are not of its responsibility can the mind let go and be still.

Stillness is found inside. This is where we go silently, secretly and preciously. This is where the outside world is no longer relevant. Nothing from outside can give us peace. Changing the world outside is not of our power. It's only inside that we can find the home. And it's always here now. It is the Presence.

There are many words to point to the same Presence. Whatever word resonates, be it Self, Love, God, Life, Source, Buddha Mind, Christ Consciousness, Tao, Zen, The Great Spirit, Divine Presence, Consciousness, Aliveness, Being... You can call it whatever you like, even make up a word, as long as you consciously know what it means. I call IT Wooo, as that how it feels when the connection is made. Find your own word that hits the bulls-eye in your experience. Then find that which The Word points to in your experience. Here now, there is a sense of something being within- a sweetness, a silent joy of Being that feels like a flow of blissful lightness through the chest. Hello, Divine Presence. This is where we rest in the silent space of truth of Being. This is what the sages and gurus and wise men and women point to. The sacred place within, that Self-love, that Spiritual Heart that resides underneath all waves of thoughts and emotions.

Hello, Presence.

We rest in that presence and listen to what is there. Simply being open to it, being receptive. Listening rather than talking. Consciously recognizing it for what it is. (again use your own word here)

Bringing focused aware attention to just being, allows the system to re-calibrate, realign, refresh, erase all that no longer serves. Then there is a deep sense of peace and a delicious, calm feeling of completeness.

There is only one Presence. We can all tune into that and make a conscious connection with it. The silence that is felt, even for a few seconds--three to four times a day is the home. We don't need to solve problems and be concerned about the future- this activity won't give you a lasting sense of peace with what is. Take time to just sit in silence, dropping all pressure from the head, releasing all wants, shoulds, desires, desire for power and security, all trying to fix or change what is apparently not working and all expectations about what this experience could be like. Be there just for the sake of being connected.

This is IT. Rest in the silent aware space. What is that? What does it have to tell you? What feeling wants to be felt? Go deeper and deeper. This is where assurance that all is well and completeness can be felt. This is how the worldly problems melt away. Fall in love with the Divine Presence and how it feels. Fall in love with Love itself. That is where the connection with the ..... (use your word) happens. And when it happens, you know! You found the golden center of Being... abide in that and that will set you free.

Inspired by The Infinite Way teaching

Behind the Curtain

You know how some days you have the same conversation with several people? Today there is a definite theme in the messages I'm receiving- and it's all about unwanted feelings. There is a theme of resisting what is. There is wanting to get rid of resistance. Ending resistance is much simpler than it seems. All it takes is looking behind that sensation, what is there?

Here is one of the the chats.

Marin:

Hi Ilona,

Ilona:

Hi :)

Marin:

First of all my English language is not so well, but I can communicate. I was seeking for last 7 years, it was very painful and confusing, but I persist and now whole no self thing is seen more and more clear. After spending years reading tons of books, youtube clips, last push happened when i was reading posts on your blog and LU forum. Today morning I decided that I must contact you, because is grown desire in me to share this message in my country in my language. I live in Croatia and this kind of looking on reality is not known. I can’t find anybody in RL or web who share something like that. As most humans also Croatian people suffer so much and I feel if this message is spread here some steps in reducing of suffering can be made. In my case maybe a few things left to clear up, maybe I have a few expectations ingrained so deep which constantly obscure smooth living. I know that is also just what is but that is how it is now in my case.  So please if you can help me on that, because I feel that I am not honest enough to share this message with my surroundings if I have some doubts left. I think now is the right moment in me to finish first step and start spreading this message. I am 39 years old male, my name is Marin, and at the and, maybe it is not important, but my favorite teacher on nonduality scene is Rick Linchitz, he was keeping my focus on these things for few years. Regards from Istria, Croatia !

Ilona:

Hi Marin! Lovely to connect! Glad to hear that no self thingy is clear now and you wish to share that with others. I had that pull to share too and look what happened!

How can I assist you?

Marin:

Thanks you response to me. It will be very helpful if I can pass through few my doubts with you. Hope so after that I will be ready to share this looking with others with honestly. I see clearly that self can’t be found outside imagination, but subtle seeking is still going on, so please what can be done in my case? I don’t know where to look any more or is just more time needed for cleaning up old habits?

Ilona:

Let's have a look together. What kind of doubt is there?

And what should be different?

Marin:

Here is persistent expectation that something must be different, after seeing this, but on the other side how it can be different, if no self  was the case before and after seeing this. I understand that, but expectations are still here. Expectations are "Things will be better".  I know that is fantasy, unrealistic mind stuff, but can’t clear this up...

One more thing, I was reading about some radical and beautiful awakenings, and maybe that also have some impact to my expectations. I know on intellectual level that that is fantasy, but, but...

Ilona:

Well, this is about not wanting to feel unwanted feelings.

Everyone's process is unique to them and yours is perfect for you.

You know, it's ok to feel what you feel.

Marin:

Yes absolutely it is that. Some resisting still going on, but what to do, it will go on until it doesn’t, it is also reality expressing itself. I think in my case that is last thing for more inspecting...

Ilona:

Allow resistance to be here and go or it. Feel it. Where is it in the body?

It's a protection mechanism. It's trying to protect something. Can you look and tell what needs to be protected?

Marin:

It is most felt in my body, as fear. During my whole life i had lots of health problems and many times life threatening danger was felt. Yes there is nothing separate to be protected, but I feel that is own body protection mechanism ..

Ilona:

The fear is protecting something. Look behind it. What is there?

Don't think, just take a peek.

Marin:

I saw these kind of question many times on LU posts, but these kind of conversation one to one is more direct and I see something is start moving in me, I will take some time for looking because i want to be absolutely honest with me and with you. Hope so, we stay in touch, after I respond to your question. Thanks !

Ilona:

It's not about intellectual analysis. Just simply look, what is behind fear.

Write what comes up.

After a while…

Marin:

Good news from here. After we finished our chat I started to look, after just few seconds everything become clear. I’ve just seen what is and what isn’t - self nowhere to find. Body, thoughts, emotions, room table, carpet-- everything present, but self no. I can’t believe that this is so simple, it is like you ask me where is elephant in my room, or do I have third leg, no need for thinking, it’s obvious that those things are not present here. I don’t know what to say -after 7 years of searching, why so hard to see something so simple. Some fears still going on, also doubts but instantly reality is checked, and they lose their grip. Finally answer to your question is that behind fear is nothing, not only fear I can’t find anything behind anything else. Thoughts spinning like before, but that now looks OK. Little fear is going on that I will lose this clarity, so if you have something to add I will be grateful. Thanks for everything!

Ilona:

Aaaaa! Yes! Excellent. That's it- simple and obvious.

Can nothing loose anything?

Marin:

Yes, you are right, who is here to lose anything ?!  I must ask one more time why, why, why is so hard to see something so obvious, why so many books and teachings and complications. I am now so, don’t know what to say, 7 years to see something so simple ???

Ilona:
It never occurs to look behind the curtain.

Marin:

Thanks one more time for everything, I am sure now that I can share this message with honesty. If one day something doubtful pops up I feel free to contact you again. Thanks, all of you help people with something beautiful.

Ilona:

You are so very welcome! Croatia is ready! :)

:)

Awakening Dialogues: Ilona and Will Are Talking About Awakening as Evolutionary Function

I was invited by Will Pye to do a dialog about awakening. It's not an interview, he says, but a friendly chat: we can talk about a chosen topic and just see what happens.

Will is a teacher and an author of a book called "Blessed with a Brain Tumor", you can visit his website here http://willpye.com/.  It was lovely to meet him and his girlfriend Elizabeth, who filmed the conversation. 

Here is the little chat between me and Will, recorded in February 2016. We talked about evolution and how awakening is an inside job. 

Hope you enjoy it!

Deep Looking

Are you at peace right now? 

If so, nice. If not, then let me introduce you a very simple way to peace. I called this technique Deep Looking. It is a blend of different kinds of releasing techniques and is mainly based on Pamela Wilson's work and Sedona method.

It is very simple to use, but before I get to the details, I'd like you to notice how mind labels everything. Where focus goes, thinking follows. If you look to the left and notice what is there right now, watch what happens with thoughts- they label and describe the seen, naming shapes, colors, naming objects, those labels may trigger a memory, so little a story may come up. Words flow when focus touches what is there. (When you see it clearly, you can describe what is seen.)

Bring focus to how you feel right now. Describe it in a few words for yourself.
Notice, words that label feelings arise when attention goes to the feelings. Just have a little play and observe how it all works.

There is one thing to end seeking, it's quite another to end resisting what is.

It's like there are layers to awakening, one more subtle than other. Seeing that no one is here doing, thinking, living a life of separate entity does not automatically end all the resistance. It's not one hit and that's it: resistance-no-longer-arises-deal. All those little thoughts, beliefs, shoulds, emotional wounds, fears, habits, stories, the whole personality of the character did not form in a day, so it does not usually collapse in a day either. If you look back at your life, there is a story. Some stories are sticky, some are vague, some trigger deep emotional pain. The pain that paralyzes and keeps one stuck in the same patterns. If you could release all this sad stuff, what would be left is pure joy of being and peace.

When resistance ends, surrendering happens, it's actually the same movement, labeled from different ends. Every little resistance released is surrendering in action. Letting go, falling off old "parts of you", stuff that no longer serves and is no longer needed.

The first step is saying: Yes, so be it.

So be it. Let all the stuff that no longer serves get de-constructed, un-created, released, dissolved, melted away, gone. Who needs those fearful patterns, right? So be it. Whatever happens in the process of releasing is OK.

If fear comes up it's only here to show you that you are entering unexplored areas, it signals that something that feels protected does not want to be seen. Let that be OK as well.

The second step- Welcoming.

This is very important and it may feel silly or even funny, but welcoming everything that comes up is The Key. Kindness, openness, gentleness, compassion, softness, honesty, love are the door openers. When pushing stops, allowing begins. It's not a weakness, but most powerful, underrated tool on the mission of clearing stuckness. But what good is the tool if it's not being used.

Thank you is the magic word.

Thanking whatever shows up turns the feeling about it around. Resistance turns into acceptance. It's the alchemy of feeling. This is the main principle of Deep Looking- welcoming, thanking, giving space for the feeling to enfold you and to pass. You can bow in honor, hug and kiss the feeling, mind and the heart. The response is one of opening, feeling of appreciation, compassion, love. You may try this now, before reading further.

Thank the heart and the mind, literally, for being such a beautiful, gorgeous heart and mind. Give them both a warm hug and a smile. Tell them that you love them SO MUCH. Bow in honor and in appreciation. Say, thank you.

That's it. If there is resistance to that, it's fine. Thank the resistance for doing such a great job of protecting whatever needs to be protected. Give a hug to resistance. Even if it sounds a bit crazy. Accepting resistance is a step closer to releasing it. After all, resistance is a friend.

Listening deeply to what the mind and the heart have to say.

When we listen to how mind and heart responds, we can take the next step. That is asking another question that rises up from the previous answer. Whatever shows up in the answer is showing the way to go deeper.

The deep Looking process is a conversation with whatever structure comes up to talk. When the focus is turned inside, notice, there is a voice talking, it's labels everything. Using this function of mind, we can have a chat with mind, heart, body, see what they want, what is in the way of having it now, what is there that needs to be protected. Talking to the mind may sound weird, but it's not any weirder than talking to other imaginary characters in the head, like your partner or parent. It's imagined role play, a game, don't take it too seriously. It does not mean that there is this entity called Mind or Heart that live inside the entity called Body. It only means that if you ask a question of the structure directly you get a direct answer. Simple.

So ask the mind if it's at peace. Literally. - Mind, are you at peace?
Wait for the answer.
............


It's either yes or no. If yes, thank the mind for the answer and ask the heart the same question.
Wait for the answer and if it comes as yes then thank the heart too and enjoy the rest of the day :)

If NO comes up, ask the mind/heart what does it want the most.
You may write the answers down, as it helps to keep focus.
..........
After each answer give thanks and honor the heart and the mind, or whatever you are talking to at that moment.
...........
Next question would be- What is in the way of feeling relaxed now?

When the answer comes welcome that feeling, let it be here for a minute and just allow it to be as it is. Then you may ask the feeling what does it want the most, and see what comes up after that...
...........

When the answer comes that feeling, mind, heart wants to relax, you ask:

Are you ready to relax?
Are you ready to relax now?

If both answers are yes, then just close your eyes and feel. Feel fully, without putting labels on what is felt. Just letting the raw sensations enfold you, play out and pass. Take your time with this one and when it feels that all has passed, bring in some more, and feel it out and then some more. And even more. Keep at it- welcoming, bringing up, feeling out, keep at the process as long as it feels right. You may imagine that there is an open door in the area of the feeling and see how the feeling is moving through that door. Alternatively, just feel. In the end, it may feel like exhaustion, tiredness. It's ok. This work requires a bit of concentration.

When feelings like fear, resistance come up, talk to them and ask, what are they protecting. When you get an answer ask the mind to LOOK if it still needs to protect that, or protection is no longer needed. If it's no longer needed you may ask if the feeling wants to leave. If it says yes, then feel it out as described above. If the answer is no, then ask what this feeling wants to tell you. Listen. Whatever the answer is, thank the feeling for the answer and focus on that which comes up in the answer. It all may sound bit complicated, but when you are there, in conversation, the questions and answers just play out by themselves. 

The only thing to keep an eye on is the focus.

The tricky thing is, that if you are coming close to some strongly protected area, mind jumps at defense and either builds a wall or creates a distraction, or even both. The wall can be a sudden boredom, laziness to carry on, sleepiness, dismissal, blankness.

Distraction can come in many forms. Suddenly you may feel that you got something else to do or focus goes to something completely unrelated, something that appears to be much more interesting. It's the trick that mind plays when something feels threatened. If you notice that this happened, bring the focus back gently. Tell the mind that this is safe and you are here only to help it to get what it wants the most. Keep looking, keep welcoming and focus on what else is there that wants to speak up.

Often some scenes from childhood come up. A little kid, you, that may be feeling unloved, abandoned, and wants to be heard. Something may have happened, that the hurt is still there, something unresolved that still needs attention, processing, and acceptance. Give a hug to that child and tell her, how precious she is and how beautiful and that you love her very much. Ask the child what she wants the most and assure that she is safe and loved, stay with her till she feels lighter. 

It's a mystery how this works, but it sure does. The Deep Looking process allows you to go right to the root of stuck energy, lets you examine the beliefs and feelings around it and release happens. A deep release, that clears the space around the issue. It fills space with love and appreciation instead of tightness and unease.

When mind and heart are content and at peace, you may ask the mind, if it knows that the heart is it's home. Ask if it's already at home and if no, ask if it wants to join with the heart. Make sure both sides agree and then just close your eyes for a bit and feel the heart, feel the energy moving and simply be with it. As long as it feels right. It feels as it feels, descriptions fail at this point, no need to name the feeling either.

After this release, the opening continues. There may be some more left to release so it will keep unfolding through next few days. This is an energetic shift, a change how you relate to what is, how you feel most of the time, a new default frequency.

If you use this by yourself, it may take patience and some time. Each time you use it, there is a little release, in a few days, weeks, there will be a noticeable difference. But if you use this technique with a partner, somebody that helps you hold the focus, the release can be really big and sudden. The whole point of a partner is to keep you at it, all the way through.

I have used this technique for about a six years now, at the beginning on myself, then with friends and people that I never met. It is amazing to see how mind mechanisms work from inside. Mind protects the heart and in this noble task it has got confused and suffering was created. Instead of looking for the root cause and releasing it, the mind creates more and more security structures to protect the heart from suffering and that only creates more suffering. In the end, the heart may feel so small, wounded and helpless. And all it wants is to love. It can love freely, but the mind keeps it "safe" from the possible hurt. Sometimes, just in case, without examining if that protection works for the good or for more tension.

The heart is at peace when it's expanded, limitless, condition-less when it loves what it loves and enjoys the feeling of it.

It is not so easy to drop suffering. But if you listen to what your mind and heart want, if you start to communicate with those two, eventually the knot will loosen and the tightness will melt away. Instead, there will be openness and acceptance. Peace with what is.

You can communicate with the body too. I find that body does not speak, it may have no voice. Instead, you can ask yes and no questions and watch what reaction appears- opening sensations, expansion- yes, closing, tightness, contraction- no. Very simple. Deep Looking works with physical symptoms too. Behind the physical symptoms is the mind, resisting something, doing its job of protection.

Protection is good and needed when it makes sense.

A lot of times, when you look inside and ask the question- what is here that needs to be protected right now?- the answer that comes may be a surprise. You may see that mind creates and protects images. What is the worst that can happen to an image?

Images do not need to be protected, as there is nothing that can harm images in any way, but a protection mechanism would still be starting up. So you can simply ask, is it true, does this still need to be protected. If the answer is yes, then find out, what is really feeling in danger. Keep looking deeper and look behind the fear. What is there?

When you see that nothing is there that needs to be protected, when you really see that, the structure collapses. It becomes obvious, that this protection is only guarding an idea, not something that is there, real. Nothing can be harmed in any way, it's nothing. Emptiness.

I had many sessions with many people and only in very few cases, the big release did not happen, which means that more patience was needed to unlock the old rusty locks. Many sessions ended up with people getting light and blissful or falling asleep, sometimes I did fall asleep too, as it does take a lot of concentration to go all the way through. But what I noticed is that when my client releases, release happens here too, it is quite interesting to be part of this process as deepening of peace happens on both sides of the conversation.

Anyway, the theory is one thing, reading or listening to someone else's process is another and it's not the same as diving right in and experiencing this simple method for yourself. You can do it anywhere anytime. In the middle of a busy day or while meditating. Just asking and acknowledging how the mind and heart feel right now creates a direct intimate connection.
Directness, immediacy, intimacy is right here, in asking a direct question.

It may feel strange to talk to heart and mind in the beginning, especially if you see that mind and heart are just labels. But give it a try, explore this and see for yourself. It may get you into deeper peace and there is nothing at all to fear or to loose using this method. If it is not working for you, never mind.

If you find this useful, share this with a friend, pass this on, try it with someone.

If you like to book a one on one Skype session with me follow this link.

Please join Deep Looking group on Facebook

Here is a recording of a live Deep Looking session. 

http://www.liberationunleashed.com/LU_Audio/LU_Deep_Looking_Worthing_July_13th.mp3

And here are a few links to some older posts on this blog:

http://markedeternal.blogspot.co.uk/2016/01/going-home.html
http://markedeternal.blogspot.co.uk/2016/01/deep-looking-with-christiane.html
http://markedeternal.blogspot.co.uk/2012/10/deep-looking-session-with-k.html
http://markedeternal.blogspot.co.uk/2012/06/looking-inside-with-n.html
http://markedeternal.blogspot.co.uk/2013/08/deep-looking-session-with-d.html

Peace. 

Deep Looking Session With K

Deep Looking is a technique of release, it works best one on one, but can also be used on your own. Of course, reading this and experiencing it is a completely different thing. If you would like to book a session, please email me. 

I:

Can we start?

K:

Yes. Ready

I:

Great.

Ok, take some deep breaths and ask the mind if its at peace.

K:

No it's not.

I:

Thank it for answer. Ask it if it wants to relax and be at peace.

K:

Yes

I:

Great. Ask the mind what is in the way of peace now.

K:

Heavy depression is in the way.

I:

Mmm, give the mind a hug.

Ask it what should be different.

K:

Just this heavy veil of oppressive weight to be lifted.

I:

Ok, thank the mind. Lets talk to the heavy veil. Ask it if it wants to leave.

K:

No answer

I:

What is the feeling in the body, you can recognise yes by expansion and no by contraction. Ask it again and watch sensations closely.

K:

Contraction

So I guess it's a no

I:

Ok. Thank it for answer.

Ask it if it wants to tell you something.

If it wants you to pay attention to something.

K:

Asked but no answer.

I:

That's ok.

Ask the mind now what is this heaviness protecting.

K:

Nothing

I:

Ask the mind if its ready to release the heaviness.

K:

Yes yes it is

I:

Great. Thank the mind and ask it if its ready to release it now.

K:

Yes

I:

Beautiful. Now take as much time as needed to feel that heaviness out. Do not name the sensations just watch the raw energy moving in the body. Come back when ready.

K:

OK

I:

ill be here.

K:

OK. Thanks

K:

I have been watching but they are still there. Same intensity. I can feel them more strongly around the chest area though.

I:

Thank the feeling for bring here, bow to it. Ask it if it wants to leave.

K:

I've thanked it but to be honest I don't feel like thanking it as its causing so much suffering

So my bowing is not genuine.

I:

Thank it.

It is a gift, which you say no to.

K:

How is it a gift ?

I:

The deep stuff that has surfaced wants to pass, wants to leave the system, can you see that? It's leaving is a gift. But to claim that gift you need to appreciate that it comes up and wants to leave.

Suffering is here because you are not open to receive this gift. It's OK, to feel as you feel.

K:

I'm sorry but I can't thank it from my heart as I cant see that. Its always returned back to trouble me time and time again. I can do it mechanically but not genuinely

I:

It's OK to want it to leave, all you can do is notice resistance. Is there resistance?

K:

Yes

I:

Lets talk to resistance. Thank it for coming up.

You don't need to like it, but thank it as sincerely as you can at the moment.

K:

OK I'll try

Have done

I:

Nice. Ask resistance what it is protecting.

K:

It is protecting me from being hurt.

I:

Of course it is. Lets speak to the heart. Tell the heart how much you appreciate it.

Ask it if its hurt.

K:

Yes

I:

Thank it and give it a hug.

Ask the heart what it wants the most.

K:

Feeling of light joy

I:

Thank it. Ask it what is in the way of feeling that.

K:

Some sort of dark cloud of something that is not clear what that is.

I:

Ask the heart, what is the black cloud covering.

K:

It is covering Itself.

As in its covering the heart.

I:

Ask the heart if the cloud is protection.

K:

Not really

I:

Ask the heart if it's ready to release the cloud.

K:

Yes it is

I:

Ask it if it's ready to release the cloud now.

K:

Yes it is

I:

Nice. Feel that cloud. Zoom right in. Observe it as sensation without naming anything. Keep focus on it while thanking it.

Open up to the cloud.

K:

It's dissipated somewhat. It's not that strong. In fact it's difficult to detect. Feels lighter now.

I:

Good. See if you can focus on whatever remains and let that pass.

K:

Good enough for now. Even this much of a lift is so satisfying. Don't even need more

But I'll keep focussing on the rest if you suggest.

I:

Ask for more to come up. Invite it. Say to it- whatever is ready to leave please leave now. And focus on energy in the body again.

K:

OK

I:

Take your time, no rush, idea is to open for more to come up so it releases itself. Thanking it and honouring helps.

K:

OK so should I continue this as and when I remember to allow it. I've got to sign off now I'm afraid but appreciate this session you did with me. Thank you so much.

I:

You are most welcome. I'm so delighted that it helps

Yes, carry on with that whenever you remember.

K:

So much time and energy you have given me and so many others. How do you mange it?

I:

Welcoming rather then pushing darkness let's it pass.

Have a great evening.

Oh, it's kind of integrated in my life now.

K:

OK Sure. Thanks again. Have a nice one too. With love

I:

Love back.

Next day

I:

How are you today? Has the darkness lifted?

K:

Hi. Not completely but enough to get about work. Somehow today I feel that the darkness I feel is not mine and I could only be the witness of it all.

I:

Nice, so you don't own the darkness. That's a start. You can open to it and let it through.

K:

OK

I:

It's when you focus on sensations that the energy moves through, release happens.

K:

Hmm. So should that be done as and when I remember? I was taught this as a meditation technique Which I used to do formally in a sitting session. Will that be of any help?

I:

This can be remembered any time that construction shows up. Open and hold space for it and energy moves.

K:

OK Will do

Thanks

I:

Would you let me share our session on my blog, with different name or initial, does not matter, I think it would be of help for some.

K:

Sure

I:

Thank you!

Looking Inside With N.

I have been working with people using this "Deep Looking" technique. It is talking to mind, heart and whatever comes up directly and listening to the answers as they come up. Being kind and showing appreciation to whatever comes up allows a deep release and expansion followed by re-connection of broken links and deep peace. Here is my conversation with N. He was skeptical and open at the same time. It was amazing what came up to the surface. Hope this is can be useful for you in looking inside by yourself.

A lot can be released if you only listen to what your mind and heart is trying to say. 

I:

i'm here is you here..

N:

yes

howdy!

I:

cool. i'm great. you?

N:

I'm feeling good, been watching some SIG retreat stuff. I came across when I first posted on LU.

I:

are you ready to start?

N:

yes

I:

ok, good. what you do is ask questions that i suggest and listen to answers, then write them to me.

ask your mind, literally: mind, are you at peace.

N:

okay, lets do it.

the first question is no.

I:

ok good. thank the mind and ask it if it would like to relax more.

N:

yes and tears.

I:

oh... give the mind a hug and a kiss.

tell it that you appreciate it very much.

N:

that calmed it down, breathing spiked for a brief moment in that sadness.

I:

Ok, ask the mind if it's ready to relax.

N:

there’s tension in the head, faint no.

I:

Ok, thank your mind. Ask it what does it want so it can relax

N:

the mind wants resolution.

throat is tense.

I:

Beautiful. Tell the mind that you are very grateful and that this desire is very welcome.

It's ok, let whatever comes up be welcome.

Ask the mind if it's ready for resolution.

N:

the mind says yes.

I:

Beautiful. Ask it if it's ready now.

N:

it says it doesn't know what to do.

I:

It's ok, tell it it's safe not to know.

Ask it what it wants to resolve.

N:

its asking if its still going to be here after the resolve.

I:

Of course! Tell it that you appreciate it very much and that it's not going anywhere. You love it and want it to keep working for you.

N:

it said okay and an image of a smile happened.

I:

Smile to the mind and give it a kiss.

Tell it now that it's safe to resolve and ask what does it want to resolve.

N:

there’s nothing there.

just fan blowing

I:

Ok, great. Ask it now if it's ready to relax more.

N:

it says yes i would like to.

I:

Beautiful. Ask it of its ready now.

N:

resistance.

its saying, you can't make me.

I:

Great! This is good. Welcome the resistance.

Tell it, thank you for showing up.

Ask the resistance what it is protecting.

N:

its protecting itself.

I:

Thank the resistance for doing such beautiful job.

Say to it how much you appreciate it working for you. Give it a hug.

Ask the resistance what is it protecting itself from.

N:

hate.

hating others.

I:

Oh, say to resistance, sorry, it's a misunderstanding. You are my friend.

N:

it doesn't want to hate others.

and tears welled up

I:

It's ok. Ask the resistance if it would like to love others instead.

N:

it says yes.

I:

Give the resistance a kiss.

Beautiful. Let's talk to the heart now.

N:

okay.

I:

Ask the heart if it can accept the resistance as a friend.

N:

it says yes!

of course.

I:

Gorgeous.

Ok, ask the mind now if it accepts resistance as a friend.

N:

it says yes i love resistance.

and its asking if that’s normal.

haha.

I:

Beautiful. Thank the mind, the heart and the resistance.

Say that yes, it's normal.

Ask the mind if it can see that resistance is love.

N:

yes i can

I:

It is working to protect the innocence.

N:

its only trying to protect.

I:

Yes.

N:

something curious

about my past

I:

Good. What is coming up?

N:

its curious in depression right now, depression isn't coming up

I:

Good stuff. Let's move on. Ask if mind is ready now to relax more.

N:

but more so about the mood swings

okay.

yes

heart moving up.

that was a sensation that was felt

I:

Great! So feel the opening, take a deep breath in and let whatever feeling is here to pass freely. Feel it fully.

Release. And then more. And more.

N:

there is blankness and one tear out of the right eye is happening.

I:

Nice. Let it all out. Feel it. Feel it fully

N:

i don't know if i can feel it fully is what its saying.

I:

No need for words. Focus on sensation in the body.

N:

small prickling on the scalp

I:

Thank the mind. Hive it a huge hug.

And a smile.

N:

mm!

I:

Cool, ask the heart to show how much it loves the mind.

N:

expansion is happening.

I:

Awesome.

Thank the heart and ask it if it's ready to expand even more.

N:

no.

no. no. no.

I:

Ask it what is in the way.

N:

hurt, abandonment.

I:

Of course! Thank it for bringing this up and give it a warm long hug.

N:

and then i get the image of me when i was younger.

tears at the image.

I:

Tell the mind that it's safe to feel.

Ask the feeling from the past to come closer.

N:

its showing me as a little child, I was at yosemite and I was in a convenient store. My parents couldn't be found. I thought they left me

so I started crying.

tears welling up again.

I hated that feeling, being disconnected

I:

Oh... Say how much you are sorry about that.

Give it a kiss like you would to that small child

Tell the heart that you love it very much.

N:

a smile.

it says it loves me back.

I:

Beautiful. Ask the heart if it's ready to release this hurt.

N:

yes.

it wants to.

I:

Is it ready now?

N:

yes.

I:

Great. Feel it open and take deep breath. Let the feeling come up and feel it. See it pass.

Release all, then more and then even more.

Feel the feeling fully. Don't interrupt. All it wants is to leave.

N:

i got the image of a flower blooming.

and safe

I:

Beautiful. Thank you heart. Bow to it with honour.

Ask the mind if it's ready to relax more.

N:

its saying yes.

I:

Gorgeous. Thank the mind, give it a smile and ask if it's ready to go down to the heart.

N:

it says it wants to but no.

I:

Ok, that's fine, tell it that. Ask it if it knows that it's home is at the heart.

N:

it said it didn't know that.

no one told it that.

I:

Ask it to check if it's true.

N:

it's not sure, it doesn't know how to go about checking, it just always assumed it had its job to do and the heart had its job to do.

I:

Yes, of course. Tell it that it can do its job perfectly while feeling at one with the heart.

N:

it says it makes sense though, because some of the best decisions have been made when it and the heart work together.

I:

Yes! Tell it it's great observation. And thank it.

Ask the heart if it accepts the mind fully and loves it with no limits.

Unconditionally.

N:

the image of the flower is still blooming

no feeling of resistance

I:

Beautiful. Now ask the mind if it made a decision, would it like to feel at home.

N:

it absolutely wants to feel at home with the heart.

it wants the marriage.

it says its actually longed for it.

I:

Beautiful!! Give both the heart and the mind a kiss

Ask the mind and the heart if they are both ready.

N:

they both say yes.

I:

Awesome!

Ask if they are ready now.

N:

yes and i got a quick glimpse of holding hands.

I:

Great. Now switch of the computer, just sit quietly , breath, and feel it joining, keep sending hugs and appreciation to both and just feel it for like 20 min. Let it happen.

N:

i told them they make a good couple.

kk

I:

I'll be here when you come back. Feel whatever comes openly with love.

See you in a bit!

N:

okie thanks be back!

N:

the first feeling that comes to mind is a very still calmness.

I:

Beautiful.

This was very moving for me too, I had tears too and deep appreciation for you showing me this.

I:

Thank you.

How you feeling, enough work or there is something else that came up.

N:

thank you Ilona, i bow to you. I needed that I I see now that just because you know that everything is self abiding, that there can still be feelings of separation at the same time

hmm. at the time there was a small movement but I welcomed it and it passed.

I don't even remember what it was anymore.

I:

Nice. Now you know what to do when mind or heart feels alone. Show them love and remind of each other.

Be very kind to both. They are here for you. All is one feeling of love.

N:

oh that's what it was, in my experience of 20 minutes, I had the image of a little child coming back to its parents

and being loved by both.

thank you!

I:

big smile!

Great work.

N:

I have so much gratitude and appreciation for your work, and thank you.

I:

Can we share this in unleashed? I think it can be very helpful for someone else.

N:

yes, I give you my permission to do so.

I:

Oh, could I put it on my blog? I can use just N if you like.

N:

of course, do whatever feels right.

I:

Thank you!

Tammy: When Curiosity Crept In The Journey Has Started..

I met Tammy in my tattoo chair. First time she came in and got a branch of orchids. Soon after she wanted it to grow. Happens a lot, tattoos tend to expand over body over time as they start shrinking in the mind. First it looks big, then it starts looking smaller and smaller...

We met again for the second session and made them flowers grow. It took a while so we talked and i mentioned what i do besides tattooing and all the LU stuff. Tammy got curious. She has never heard about no self before, she has never been a seeker and never read anything 'spiritual'. Yet curiosity got her. And little by little we started talking about what is really going on here.

The realisation came as Tammy investigated the question of control, and if she is really in control of what happens. once she saw that, the rest was easy.

We met once more for another extension of tattoo and the piece is complete. Same as Tammy's journey through the gateless gate. You know, the one that does not exist.

Here are the Final 5 questions that we give to all who cross, and here are Tammy's answers. And thank you Tammy for the orchids that sit on the window in my studio. :)


Tammy:
Is there a 'me', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever? 

There is no i / me controlling anything! Not controlling thoughts, not controlling seeing, not controlling hearing and not controlling decisions. In fact, no I / me controlling anything!

Thoughts come and go on their own and cant be stopped. So no i/me controlling thoughts either…hmmm, crazy huh!!

No, there was never a me, not ever because there is no me/i.

Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works.

Not totally sure when exactly the illusion starts, but society and parents give baby/child this identity and this belief that 'i' is in control of thoughts, decisions, hearing, seeing….life etc 

By living by this belief, when things go right in the individuals life, the individual thinks that this success is down to ‘me’ this is when egos are created and self praise starts. Conversely, when things go wrong, the individual also thinks that this is down to them, thus creating suffering. Thoughts and feelings of inadequacy, failure, hopelessness and sadness take over the ‘me’ that has been created and create this mental torture. 

Suffering is created when the mind creates its own story to sensations felt in the body. In the illusion, this is put down to 'us' being sad/unhappy etc when really its just mind creating a fabricated story from a sensation in the body. Sensations in the body come and go, but when mind gets involved, these sensations can be intensified and lead to fictional stories being created. This mental torture is constantly trying to seek approval from both external sources and ‘self’ in order to sort of reinstate the ‘ego’ as a successful ‘me’.
By seeing and accepting that ‘me’ is not in control of anything and life is just happening without a controller, life becomes a lot more simple, more relaxed and this mental torture diminishes!
'We' are just characters acting out the role just as the script says – under no control of anyone!

How does it feel to see this?

A rollercoaster of emotions would best describe ‘seeing this’

At first is seems crazy, impossible….of course there has to me a me/i!!?? Then as questions start to get answered and seeing becomes clearer then comes the confusion! How can this be? It can't be? It is true! How can it be true? IT IS TRUE! 

Then comes some anger – where have these lies come from? How can it be allowed? Why didn’t mum / friends / society tell ‘me’ the truth?

Still not done… next came some more confusion, followed by a sort of concentration phase where things were looked at and questioned closely, people, animals, life etc

Then came relief, happiness, a sort of understanding and a moment of just being! Some smiling, a little giggle, some excitement and butterflies in tummy! Questions still come up, but get answered a lot quicker and without worry.

How would you describe it to somebody who has never heard about this illusion but is curious about it. 

‘I’ had entered into this with total naivety and curiosity. Unlike others, ‘I’ had not been consciously searching for years, So entered into the journey with no expectations at all, just total curiosity and an ‘open mind’ to question and look. Plus in life at the time of looking, was surrounded by like minded people, so was interested in experiencing something new and testing thoughts and understanding.

Once ‘I’ watched the documentary on decisions and saw that ‘me’/’I’ did not control decisions it provided the first piece of truth to which the rest of the journey was built upon. If decisions are made in the brain, up to 6 seconds before they become apparent/clear/acted upon, then ‘I’ am not actually in control of the decisions made like we grow up thinking/assuming. 

Next was thoughts – they just come and go without any controller. All this time assuming that ‘I’ was controlling thoughts when really they are just coming and going!! 

So, if ‘I’ is not controlling thoughts and decisions, then what is ‘I’ actually? ‘I’ does not exist… if unsure, try and touch ‘I’???!!!! Did you manage to touch it? Or did you touch the physical body of the character you are playing???

Seeing through the illusion is a real awakening, quite refreshing and brings about a feeling of contentment.

Once the truth is seen, there is less pressure, less worry about the future and generally a sunnier outlook!
By looking there is nothing to lose, but everything to gain!

What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

Journey started just talking with Ilona whilst having a tattoo done! Then the curiosity crept in and the journey had fully started!

Coming from a sports background where success and failure is put down to the individual or team of individuals, ‘I’ had always had this feeling of unfulfillment, as if I had never achieved my full potential as a player, a coach and life in general. Life was spent constantly searching for the next thing, fearing failure and always seeking approval from others. Certain situations caused feelings of adversity, not because of the actual situation, but because of worrying what others would think. Trying to impress and be the best, rather than concentrating on the task in the here and now.

Once things started to be seen and ‘I’ realised that ‘I’ am not actually in control of any of it, merely acting out the role that has been assigned and life is just perfect, things became a lot better! Situations that had before caused anxiety, came and went with a feeling of lightness and enjoyment. Focusing on the ball / task without worrying meant 100% of energy was put into the job in hand! No point stressing about what may/may not happen, just concentrate on the present! 

The final push came in a period of darkness, conflict, family drama and problems! After being wonderfully guided through this conflict by Ilona and the realisation that sensations in the body come and go, but when mind gets involved, these sensations can be intensified and lead to fictional stories being created! Everything suddenly became so simple!!!

It Was Intense for Philip, But He Made It Through.

Philip:
Dear Ilona,

I love reading the conversational posts on your blog, you come accross as very patient and understanding yet don't allow any bullshit to slip by. I'm a fifty five year old man living in Australia and like Bedri I have been inquirying into this for many years and have a great deal of conceptual understanding of the illusion of self. Yet I have not seen it directly. Do you think that possibly some like myself are just simply unable go beyond that point?

Cheers


Ilona:
Thanks for email.
It is possible that the wall of knowing is so thick that simple thing is not visible.

Like in bedri's case, it took a month to make a hole in the concepts to allow the possibility of looking. Once looking starts it is simple, but to get to that point one needs to be ready to look at everything with fresh eyes.

Are you ready? I can help.

Philip:
Thanks for that Ilona,

It would be great if I could get some help.

At times I think so deeply about this my mind seems to seek revenge; it wakes me up at 2am with thoughts of unsolvable puzzles which trigger panic attacks. During the waking hours I have been meditating on the notion that everything is as it should be and could not be any other way, so I should give up any resistence to what is and go along with what ever comes up even the panic thoughts. This does work to a degree but not to shift anything in a lasting way, maybe it is just another theory or technique? Anxiety about what may happen in the future dominates most of my thinking and as you say it seems very thick and strong. The simple seeing seems very illusive.

Ilona:

No, it's not just another theory or technique. This is one time seeing and you done. What is seen, can not be unseen, just the same way as you can never believe that Santa is real.

It's not about fighting resistance, it's about clearing up crap inside that clashes and creates that resistance.
We are not looking here for new belief, but simple truth.

You know, truth will set you free.


What I want you to do is answer me with 100% honesty and only then, when the answer feels right. No rush, but when I point to look, really look.

So now look at the real possibility that there is no you in real life. That all is going by itself without a manager.

Look inside and tell me, what feeling comes up, do you recognise fear, resistance, frustration, what is it?

Describe what you see.

Philip:
Hey Ilona,

When I consider the possibillity that there is no me there is a great fear and saddness that arrises a feeling that I will loose my family and all that I have become. It seems far too unknown, to give into, what if I accept this and go mad. Maybe I don't trust it will deliver. I understand that there is no control really, but that understanding does nothing to reduce the fear of uncertainty.
I really don't know what truth is. Is it true all this exists?


Ilona:
Of course this looks scary and sad. Let it be ok. It's just fear, your family is fine and nothing will change. Everything is already running perfect, no matter what thoughts say about it.

Now look at that fear.
Can you see that this is a mechanism of protection, that this fear is hiding something from being found out? Can you notice how perfectly it does it's job, can you respect and honour that mechanism. ?

Now look at it and just let the fear be, without fighting it, now look behind.

What is behind? What do you see?


Philip:
Yes! Yes! I can see how tenacious the fear is as you say it seems to be protecting something and constantly testing my resolve. The fear is very efficient Yes. At times it is so overwhelming and debilitating but wow reading your email I had a glimpse of the behind and I started laughing out loud, this was in an architects office where I work so strange to have that moment in such a stiff uptight environment. I will write some more tonight.

Ilona:
Great!
Yes, please write more tonight.
Answer this:
What needs to need protected?
Digg more here ;)


Philip:
My life as I know it needs protection, this sense of me in the world, it seems like a delicate balance of good and bad. I can see the absurdity of that because it just causes so much misery when things go more to the bad, but itslike I'm right in it . its seems impossible to see a way out with out everything crashing or me going mad. The glimpses I get are only that and the whole thing rolls back in again. When you said what is behind the fear I felt a very calm sense of peace like a clear sky behind a dark dust cloud and it seemed so obvious I laughed. Yet I feel great frustration at not really seeing this fully, then I ask who or what is frustrated, is I who is frustrated, who is seeing the frustration. I have been to the RT site and I like what they do there but I find I so easily turn things into theories ideas concepts and forumula. Ilona you blow me away, you don't know me for Adam yet you take the time for this. Why? I mean don't get me wrong it is truely wonderful but no one I know would do this not even my therapist or my wife, amazing!

Even the writing of this is being criticised by a voice in my head as being useless at times it really is a battle going on in there. I will write some more later in the day its 8.40am here and freezing.
Cheers


Ilona:
It's a great start we are having here, you busted through fear in no time. Yes, behind fear is nothing, peaceful silent nothing and yet it makes so much fuss in human lives.

We will go through this step by step and at the end it will all become clear.

Trust that. The process has started. Now you just need to notice, that it is happening already. All by itself.

I'll help you with frustration. No one is feeling, seeing or owning it. You can look and go mad and never find it. Just do the same as with fear, look right at frustration, look at the friction of beliefs and burning for the truth. It's there, showing the way forward. Just a feeling that rises up. Feelings come and go like thoughts, notice that and just let them be there.


Now I want you to look at real possibility that there is no manager in life at all.
What comes up?
Thoughts, feelings, just examine everything and look what else is there.


Why I do this? There is no gift greater than man's freedom. I just want to keep delivering it. :) or in over words, this is just happening as part of the flow.

The battle in the head will dissolve once we look at it, for now don't look at content, but what is going on in there:
Thoughts racing, charged with emotions.
All this is effortless. Can you see?


It's midnight here in sunny England.
:)

Philip:
Frustration. There is tension in that I sense I am very close I can smell the freedom yet ........can't even say what it is. All the knowing is done. Is it courage?

Ilona:
Frustration is good at this time, just go with it, let it be there. Notice that it's a feeling+ labeling of the mind.
What do you mean by "all knowing is done"?

Carry on Phillip. What is it.....?

Philip:
It is lightness of being. I have this lightness pervading everything its like the heaviness is lifting from the body. The' knowing' that is done, what I meant is that I don't feel the need at the moment to read anymore Tolle etc Which I have in the past. I have this sense of something falling away and as you say just letting it all happen I'm not in control how could I be, it just appears that way, but that is ok for the character Phil because that is his nature, appearance, just appearing and seeing that appearance. Cool!
Sorry I am unable to write more at the moment will continue

Ilona:
Dear Philip.
How is it going? Are you through?


Philip:
Ilona,

Yeah! I can see the possibility yet there is great deception and dishonesty. As much as I want so much to directly see this (do I?) the fear is doing a great job as well as wanting to please you, because you have transcended this, which is more 'me' I know. I could write a paper on this yet there is nothing shifting nothing direct. Mind on Mind on mind tricks. Fuck it! Years of crusty protection how do you break through that?
At times its seems like a great chasm. I want to be honest, yet when I wake up in sweat at 1 in the morning there is nothing to hold on to. Help!

Ilona:
Hi Philip.

Great to see you are back.
I was gonna come looking for you.

You can not see this, as there is no you. There is only seeing happening, seen, seer and the seeing being the same one thing.

Fear is just a mechanism that protects the illusion from being find out. It is doing great job, but if you look behind you see that there is nothing there, nothing needs to be protected.

You don't need to understand everything about the wall in order to demolish it, right, you just hammer it through. By looking at protection itself, how does it work, what does or do?

What do you see here?

No there is nothing to hold on, everything you think you know is useles here.
Because there is no one there that needs to hold on, only thoughts arising : "scary, there's nothing to hold on"

Who is thinking those thoughs? Or maybe they are just passing by as a result of clashing of different beliefs?

Investigate that. Who is thinking? What is behind thinking? What influences thoughts?

Thought does not think, it it true?


Philip:
Hey. Yes something more direct. During a Panic atack at 4am this morning I saw that it was just this dense ball of thought begging to be acknowledged and the beginings of the wall of fear. For the first time I had clarity to see it for what it was just another dense black cloud passing through not belonging to anyone. There is no ownership, ownership brings the burden of maintaining something, I sensed that the control I was so desperate for was not possible or necessary, when I gave it up its like the grip of fear was dimished, and it wasn't mine just fear. Its like the opening I have been looking for, the gate. Beyond that black cloud I could sense the clear sky. Sweet sweet taste. I feel like I can push it more


Ilona:
But who/what is there to push?
Is it not all just happening by itself? The unfoldment, manifestation of life in every moment? Experience + labelling of the mind is also part of everything. All happening without control.
Is it true, that there is no "I" to experience, that I is just a thought that passes by just like that cloud of fear without control? A thought preceding other thought and thought does not think.
Who is sensing, or is it just sense of freedom appearing in awareness?
Now it's soooo close!
............

How is everything looking today?

Philip:
The 'I' is an assumed identity referring to some centre or personal
source, my source. It’s full of me-ness precious me-ness. The organism
has unity but it has no centre the whole centre thing is impossible
where did it come from, how could you think that. It’s all part of a
whole organism all interrelated. There is still this sense of absence,
like a hollow emptiness that is both frightening and beautiful. There
is letting be but letting be by who? Does there need to be a doer, or
is there just doing. Each time the mind needs to refer to an author
and doer the 'I' has come in yet that is also seen. Each seeing
emanates that sense of relief but it’s more than that but I don't have
the word, like I said before all I can say is that it is a sweetness a
sweet sweetness. I can't seem to talk to others about this it always
sounds so clumsy and comes out like an awkward philosophy so I don't.
There is no thinking about or no doing just seeing and the me-ness
makes no sense it seems to need that support. Things as you say look
after themselves the brain drives the car very well, it even designs
the house and the me seems to come in later to want to make sense of
it, really very funny when it is seen. The world is so full of my this
and my that its hilarious.

Ilona:
I had to read what you wrote 3 times to get what you are saying. Yes it is difficult to express in words. But I see you are starting to see!! :)

Remember movie matrix, when neo gets out and he looks around and says- my eyes hurt, and the answer comes- you have never used them before...

So is with thinking and putting sentences together. When you look at life with fresh eyes, and have to find your own words to describe what you see.

Sweetness. I like this word.

Me-ness, define that, please. Can you look a bit more here, what is that?

And what is Philip?


Philip:
Thank you for being so patient. The me-ness is the concern for the
fictious 'I'. Its like say taking offence at being insulted when
someone judges or cricitises you, say reacts to what you said as being
'stupid'. The character Philip has learnt to defend the me-ness. But
what is the me-ness but just this construct of the story of the person
Philip. Yet the person the me-ness seems to have this mind of its own,
it reacts and come up with offence no matter what. that is the
frustration. I can see all this but it still goes on. Is this just the
process of dismantling or am I missing something.

Thank you so much Ilona.

Ilona:
If I get it right, your word me-ness is the glue that holds illusion together.

How is that glue these days, still strong and sticky or is it getting looser?

Philip:
Yeah! Nice, the glue is brittle and falling away as we speak like old
resin. When I see this it reminds me of when I was a child a very
familar sense and an.... 'of course' moment, its like as if I had been
lost in this wilderness for 50 years and just managed emerge from the
darkness but its like something I knew all along its very familar. The
character Philip still seems a bit lost and bewildered having to be in
the world.

Ilona:
It's ok, Philip is fine. Just that a huge chunks of belief has been knocked out, he needs a bit of time to rebalance.
Conditioning will keep falling off for a while, depending on how many stored beliefs are in the system.
To help this process you can look at the most precious beliefs closest to the heart. Just examine what is there, identify and release.

So what is real?
Is there a self in any shape or form in reality?

Please give me the answers. :)

Philip:
Hey Ilona,

Life is profoundly empty and meaningless and what a relief. Ultimately there is nothing in the ' this', it’s like the present is paper thin but really nothing it has no dimension.The brain fleshes it out to give the whole thing dimension and to make sense of it in terms of this separate me. The brain has learnt so much about being in the world and still conducts process with that knowledge but hey the difference is it’s not doing it for anyone it’s just doing it. There
is no need for someone to control things and make decisions in fact that would not be possible there is no control life is in free fall.
Its just that somehow somewhere along the line something has assumed ownership of intent and outcome, as you say its all on auto matic. The strictures of this assumption are so obvious and profoundly different its like being anally retentive your whole life, the sphincter muscle holding it all in, try to control the uncontrollable for all those years and for what? Limitation... Fresh and new my tinnitus stop for the first time this morning in twenty years just silence, sweet....
Belief... Philip believes in goodness and integrity in the love of his
family and doing his best. All ok but just tasks mapped out within a
limited perspective.

Its so utterly obvious the world seems mad inside this totally unecessary limitation. I was reminded of that song by Delamitri
'swimming with your boots on driving, with the brakes on'

Thank you Sweet Ilona in the emptiness you helped me see.

Ilona:
You are most welcome, Philip.
I'm so glad you looked and saw it. Thank you so much.
And welcome to the living free.

With love.
Ilona


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