Seeing Through the Self Illusion: Round 3 Is Coming

I’m getting ready for Round 3 of Seeing Through the Self Illusion, which begins in October.

This is an 8-week guided self-inquiry experience for people who are sincerely interested in looking at one of the most fundamental questions we can ask:

Who am I really?

Many people come to this inquiry after years of seeking. And still, something hasn’t quite clicked. You may feel exhausted by this merry-go-round of another book, another teacher, another podcast, waiting to hear the final words that will make it all make sense. And it may seem that you are never going to get it because somehow you are not good enough. That painful place keeps driving a search that seems to have no destination.

Understanding that there is no separate self is very different from seeing it directly in your own experience. This is where the work we do in Seeing Through the Self Illusion.

Over eight weeks, I guide you through a structured inquiry using pointers, questions and exercises that give you a clear direction in which to look. Each week opens another angle of investigation, from identity, thought and language to control, the doer, the mind and the question of who you really are.

You do the looking in your own time with weekly recorded material and home inquiry. There are also live Zoom group meetings where you can bring your questions, doubts, confusion and discoveries. The meetings are offered and recommended, although you can complete the entire course in your own time if you are unable to attend them.

What I value about the eight-week format is the consistency it creates. Recognition happens in a moment, but there is no way to manufacture that moment. What we can do is keep looking, question what we have assumed to be true and give the inquiry enough time and attention for recognition to happen.

And when recognition happens, that is not the end of life or the end of looking. It opens another place to look from.

Round 3

Registration opens on October 10th.

The experience begins the following week, with two group times available:

Saturday group: 08:00 UTC, starting October 17th
Monday group: 14:00 UTC, starting October 19th

I will also be holding two free one-hour Q&A meetings on October 10th, at 08:00 UTC and 14:00 UTC. You can come along, hear more about the experience and ask me anything you would like to know before deciding whether it is for you.

Over the next couple of weeks I’ll be sharing more details.

If you would like to be informed when registration opens and receive the details for the live Q&A meetings, join my email list here.

Join my email list

I Understand It All… But Nothing Has Shifted

There is a moment many sincere seekers reach that feels quietly unsettling.

You understand the language of awakening. You know the teachings. You may have had glimpses, openings, moments where something felt clear or spacious. And yet, when you are honest, nothing has truly settled. There is still confusion. There is still a sense of “me.” And it can start to feel like you’ve failed.

When I hear this, I don’t hear failure.
I hear honesty.

What often happens here is that the old strategy stops working. The strategy of trying to understand your way into peace. Trying to think your way into clarity and to arrive somewhere “after” this moment.

Seeing through the self illusion is not a feeling. It is not peace, certainty, or emotional relief. It is a simple recognition. And after that recognition, life continues. Old patterns, emotions, sensations, and a familiar sense of “me” still arise. That does not mean you didn’t see. It means something else is asking to be met.

Much of the suffering comes not from what is present, but from resisting what is present. From believing that clarity should feel a certain way. From quietly expecting awakening to erase confusion forever.

If you are tired of trying to figure this out, that exhaustion may not be a problem. It may be the doorway.

I wrote a short piece called “I Understand It Intellectually, But Nothing Has Shifted” as a gentle guide for this exact moment. You can read it slowly, return to it, and let it meet you where you are.

You can receive the PDF here:
👉 https://bit.ly/4qVdXPR

Nothing is wrong with you.
And nothing essential is missing.

Meeting the Part Inside You That Has Been Waiting

There may be a place inside you that has been calling for a long time. Maybe you feel it as a tightness, a pressure, a pull. Maybe it shows up as restlessness, heaviness, or a quiet ache with no name. This isn’t a story to analyse or a memory to fix. It’s a living energy, here now, wanting your presence in the most innocent way.

Many seekers know this place well. Years of practice, healing, and inquiry may bring clarity, yet this one feeling keeps returning. The mind often interprets that as failure —
Why is this still here?
Why can’t I rest?
What am I missing?
I have done so much inner work and this scream is still not letting me sleep at night.

My friend, nothing is wrong. You’re not behind. You’re not missing anything. This part of you has simply been waiting to be truly met. 

In a recent session, Bo described this inner pull in a way that many can recognise. He said, “I’ve discovered there’s such a… I would call it a scream inside of me. You know, an inner part that is screaming for attention from other people.” That is how it often feels — not like a thought, but like a cry inside the body that has nowhere to go.

For him, resting had become almost impossible. “Either I try to be present with that part that is so screaming for attention from the outside, or do I get taken away in bringing in attention to that part.” That tug-of-war — staying with the feeling or getting pulled into it — is deeply familiar to many seekers. Neither side feels peaceful.

And yet, the moment we turned toward that energy together, everything began to soften. A gentle attention. A willingness to feel without running away. A surrender to the present moment as it is.

At one point, I asked him to invite the feeling closer, to see what it might want. As he looked, something subtle shifted. “There’s some response… the spaciousness is more or something.” This is how the inner world speaks — not in concepts or explanations, but in movement, warmth, expansion.

Later, he said softly, “I could see what the issue was, but I didn’t know what to do.” This is the moment many seekers reach: they understand the pattern, they see the behaviour, but they have no access to the place where healing actually happens. That access opens only when we stop trying to solve and begin to meet what is here.

As the session unfolded, sincerity deepened, and something inside him opened. Toward the end, he whispered, “Oh, I want to cry… said in my heart… really grateful.” This is what happens when a long-ignored part finally receives the attention it needed — not analysis, not fixing, but simple presence. The whole system exhales.

This is the heart of Deep Looking. Just meeting what appears with the same care you would offer a child who has been waiting for someone to notice their tears.

When the energy feels seen, it relaxes.
When it feels welcomed, it softens.
When it feels safe, it stops fighting.

If you feel a part inside you that doesn’t settle — a pressure, a longing, a quiet cry for attention — please know you are safe. You don’t need to fix anything. You don’t need to figure it out. You can meet this with gentleness. The peace you seek isn’t elsewhere. It lives exactly where the discomfort is.

If this touches something in you, I invite you to watch the conversation. Maybe it will help you meet your own inner world with a little more softness today. 

If you want to explore this more deeply, I created a short guide called Introduction to Deep Looking. It’s a gentle way to meet what’s here and begin unwinding the tension that sits underneath seeking. You can receive it by signing up on my website. Here is the link:

https://ilonaciunaite.com/deep-looking-ebook/

If you read it and something moves in you, you are welcome to write to me and share what opened.

Trust Yourself — The Key to Your Spiritual Awakening (A conversation with Luchana Uzunova)

 

Awakening isn’t an escape from life. It’s a shift in perception — a change in how you see yourself and the world. It comes through direct recognition of what you truly are, and what you never were.

In this episode of Awakening Now, I spoke with Luchana Uzunova, a nonduality guide whose work bridges clarity, embodiment, and the living expression of awakening. Our conversation moved through what happens after the self-illusion falls away — when the “me” is no longer at the center of experience, yet life continues, vibrant and ordinary.

Many seekers imagine awakening as an endpoint, a place of permanent bliss. Luchana and I both discovered it’s not the end at all — it’s the beginning of a deeper unfolding. The peace that follows awakening is not a fixed state; it’s a living rhythm. Life keeps inviting us to see more clearly, to meet what was previously hidden, and to let love move through the body in ever-new ways.

We talked about embodiment, about the tender process of allowing emotions and energy to surface after awakening. When the old structure collapses, everything that was suppressed comes to light. Embodiment isn’t about perfection — it’s about honesty. It’s the willingness to stay with what is, without trying to escape into ideas or bypass what still asks to be felt.

A theme that ran through our dialogue was trust. Trusting direct experience. Trusting the intelligence of life. Trusting that what unfolds — even when uncomfortable — is part of the same awakening movement. Luchana spoke beautifully about curiosity as the way forward: not fixing, not knowing, simply staying open to what life reveals next.

As we spoke, it became clear that awakening integrates through the smallest details of daily living — washing dishes, feeding cats, meeting friends, feeling joy, feeling sadness. When the imaginary division between “spiritual life” and “ordinary life” dissolves, what’s left is wholeness. There’s no longer a line between awareness and the world. Everything is included.

If you’ve already glimpsed what you are and wonder what comes next, this conversation is for you. Luchana ends with a message that carries the essence of our exchange:

“If it can happen for one, it can happen for all.”

You can listen to the full conversation here: 

The Biggest Assumptions Of A Seeker

Almost everyone begins with expectations. How this should look, how I will feel, and the fear that something important will be lost. The mind projects outcomes and then warns, “Don’t look, it’s dangerous.” That is a protection pattern. One honest look is enough to start dismantling the old structure.

There is a point where you have to look for yourself. Put ideas and expectations aside and check what is actually here. What is real and what is imagined. The mind may say, “If I see this, I will stop functioning. I will lose my family, my job, my body.” These are stories that block the looking.

Another common snag is the doubt, “It cannot be this simple.” For the mind, simplicity is threatening. It prefers to analyze, predict, and build. But the power is in the simple immediacy of direct experience. If you notice the thought, “Is it really this simple?” that is a good sign. You are looking in the right place. The mind may need time to settle with that.

A big expectation on this path is that awakening must be a grand experience, after which everything changes forever. We hear other people’s stories and wait for fireworks, then dismiss everyday life, washing dishes, walking the dog, as “not it.” Awakening Experiences happen and they come and go. States come and go. Awakening itself is not a state or a special experience. It is the ordinary, living recognition that is here now. That is more liberating than waiting for something else.

Sometimes people say, “I looked, nothing happened.” Notice what “nothing” is. Seeing nothing is still seeing. The mind looks for a “something,” a wow, a concept, a state, and overlooks the obvious. When there is a glimpse and you do not have language for it, trust your own experience. What opens is not small.

So the invitation is simple. Look at what is obvious instead of seeking what is not here. Turn attention to the immediacy of right now. Answers are not in concepts or avoidance. They are in direct experience, as it is, whether blissful or messy. You are here as the space in which everything unfolds. Whatever appears moves through. The space remains.

Trust your experience and the process. The mind may dismiss what matters most because it does not fit a story. Does this resonate? Have you met any of these places? If so, let’s keep looking together.

Direct Pointing Sessions on Video

Starting this Saturday watch recordings of Direct Pointing sessions and follow Jim’s journey of discovery. A new video will be released every Saturday for five weeks. Subscribe to the channel to get notified when a new part comes out. 

Jim came to the Liberation Unleashed forum and was open to share his process with everyone, just like people in Gateless Gatecrashers and Liberation Unleashed books. This is a self-inquiry on video, where I ask questions and Jim has to look and find answers by himself. You can use this video as a guide for you too. When a question is asked, before watching Jim’s reply, first answer it for yourself. 

Hope you enjoy this and if you find it helpful, share with your friends!

Enlightened Ego Trip

Yes, there are real masters, and they are rare and precious. But many people who present themselves as enlightened teachers—especially online—are not. Often they are people who have come to believe they are special, and that belief quietly takes over.

While in Mexico, I once encountered a particularly striking example. A man calling himself Swami Rajneesh had built a retreat center in the jungle called Ozen. Thousands of spiritual tourists passed through, searching for something. On the surface, there was music, yoga, festivals, and creative energy. Yet as I walked around the place, something felt off. White marble floors and chandeliers stood in the middle of the jungle. There were Japanese restaurants and star-shaped glass houses that felt strangely disconnected from their surroundings. The atmosphere carried a sense of excess and artificiality that was hard to ignore.

Then I met the “master.” Within minutes, he introduced himself to my husband and me as an enlightened being and made it clear he did not feel the need to explain himself. The conversation quickly became a monologue about his achievements and experiences. Around him, young devotees listened with total devotion, hanging on every word. The contrast between the claims and the palpable tension in the space was unsettling.

He spoke at length about his path, his years of silence, and his exceptional status. Yet there was no quietness around him, no ease. We later offered a meditation light we had brought, thinking it might interest the community. Before even understanding what it was, he dismissed it as dangerous. After trying it, he admitted it was impressive—but still showed no real openness or curiosity.

What stood out most was not the disagreement, but the atmosphere. Everything in the center required his approval. His presence dominated the space. It was clear that the structure revolved around him, and that unquestioned authority had taken root.

History is full of examples where strong personalities attract seekers. When someone repeatedly declares themselves enlightened, there will always be people willing to believe it. Many are genuinely longing for clarity, belonging, or relief from suffering. Over time, the most dangerous part can happen quietly: the teacher begins to believe their own story completely. That belief becomes harmful—not only to others, but to the person holding it.

There is a long and painful history of cults built around inflated spiritual identities. Some have ended in extreme tragedy. Even when they don’t, the cost can be high. People lose autonomy, discernment, and trust in their own experience. They pay dearly for becoming part of someone else’s unexamined sense of specialness.

...

I once had a close friend with whom I spent a lot of time talking online. Over the years, I witnessed her struggles, her patterns, and the ways unresolved childhood pain shaped her behavior. There was sincerity in her seeking, and also a deep confusion that had not yet been met.

Later, she began writing books and positioning herself as a spiritual authority, offering guidance on enlightenment. When we finally met in person, the contrast between the image she was trying to uphold and what was actually present became impossible to ignore. She wanted to teach, urgently, yet could not turn toward her own shadow. The tension between wanting to be someone important and feeling profoundly lost was overwhelming for her.

That meeting ended our friendship.

I stepped away not out of judgment, but because I could no longer support something that felt untrue and potentially harmful. What followed was painful — defensiveness, blame, and public justification framed as honesty and transparency. I did not engage. Leaving was the only honest response available to me.

She has followers now, people who admire her and reflect back the identity she is trying to maintain. This is not kindness. Supporting an inflated spiritual persona may feel generous, but it often deepens the very split that needs healing. When pain is bypassed through spiritual authority, it does not disappear — it waits.

Where there is a need for followers, humility quietly slips away. With that comes the pressure to maintain an image, to be consistent, to be admired. Underneath, there is often exhaustion and fear, held at a distance. Peace cannot grow there.

I no longer carry anger about this. I see how easy it is to confuse insight with embodiment, and recognition with completion. When the identity eventually collapses — as identities do — what remains may finally be free to meet what was avoided. Until then, distance is a form of care.

The Metaphor of Water

A Gift of Presence

Mind Movies

A closer look at the imagination and how we are constantly watching movies in the Mind Movie Theater, believing that the character on the screen is ME.

Deep Looking Testimonial

Here is a beautiful email I received after just one session of Deep Looking. Receiving such messages makes me even more inspired to do my work. I love seeing the transformation and witnessing your process of awakening to reality. Each session we go deeper and open up more. Whatever comes to be seen is welcomed and honored. I love to sit with you and share this Deep Looking tool. 

“Hi Ilona,

Thank you for the meeting yesterday, it was a very special experience, and so far the change in perception of reality is sticking and is similar to coming out of long Vipassana retreats.

Truly amazing how simply and beautifully this works, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I will try to keep this brief but from the heart of the exact experience as good as I can.

Yesterday evening after our meeting I felt very present in the body, and movements of hands and body were more coordinated than usual, and there was no feeling of having to rush anything, I moved slowly and elegantly with easy in mind and body. It seems like the before omnipresent stress sensation of always having to be somewhere else than here and now is somewhat diminished. I laid in bed before sleeping and felt the bedding and cushions wrap around me like never before, really noticing the sensations, the thoughts had less of a grip on "me" and I slept very well.

I woke up with a tiny smile this morning for the first time in a long time, and instead of my meditation routine, I decided to just be aware of sensations and try to communicate internally with anything that needed to be seen and noticed, loved and accepted.

I have been able to keep that awareness very much all day, and have had moments of butterfly feelings by just watching my daughter, and even just sitting quietly and looking at objects has at times today brought some interesting sensations that I have never noticed before.

Anger, irritability, and confusion has arisen in the belly today, has been acknowledged and loved and have disappeared again before sticking around as usual for long periods.

Everything in life seems now less urgent and has less meaning and tension around it, like the attachment to outcome is less. I went through my facebook feed and unfollowed a bunch of pages with "answers" to some of all my searching and had a feeling I really don't need that clutter anymore.

I also had feelings of more energy, and some restlessness came along with that, I sat with it and accepted that as well.

It feels like everything is the same everywhere around me, but the awareness has grown, and tension in the mind-body connections is less.. There is a growing joy in my being of feeling things and emotions more strongly, and feeling like being a part of life once again.

Tonight I will try some more Deep Looking and ask mind and heart of they are at peace, and see what answers come up - during my day today there has been more focus on raw sensations most of the day, not much inquiry about the messages the sensations bring with them.

I am trained in many modalities, healing, coaching, Chi-Kung etc etc (like most seekers probably) but I never felt the urge or interest in helping people with any of the techniques I have learned, it just seemed a little useless, like a band-aid on a big wound. I feel what I got from Deep Looking is completely different, and the only thing I would offer to anyone in the search for freedom.

I will be all ears and mentally noting how we go about with the process, and would love to learn more, and be able to guide people the way you have done with me, if that is okay with you of course?

Have a beautiful day

With heartfelt thanks and love”

Blind Spots

 A Short Story

Andrea and Danny, a married couple moved to Costa Rica three years ago. A good friend of theirs named Paul who had been friends with them for at least ten years was thinking about moving there too. He was invited to visit the couple to determine whether or not he would also move. They made an agreement that Paul would pay partial rent, and also help with the daily living while he stayed for three weeks in their apartment.

Andrea liked to have Paul around, he seemed like an honest and generous guy. He knew a lot about food. His cake was delicious. Paul cooked some vegan meals a few times and it was great to taste something new.

Danny introduced Paul to their friend and neighbor Valentina who lived in the same building, on the ground floor apartment. The four of them had some fun times together.

As it was, both Andrea and Danny had birthdays a couple of days apart and Paul kindly offered to buy them a present. He saw that they did not have a blender and while Andrea was at work, Paul and Danny went to the supermarket and bought one. When they got home and tried to start it, it did not work.

The next day, Andrea went with Paul to return the blender for a refund. He said he intended on buying another one.

Valentina had an idea to buy a birthday present too. She was using her blender every day and she thought her friends could use one. That day when Paul bought it, Valentina saw him coming home with the new blender. She thought that Paul had stolen her idea and got a blender for her friends.

The thing is, Paul did not buy another blender. He took the money back and forgot the whole birthday present idea. It seems that along with forgetting to buy another blender, he too forgot about the rent. He did some cooking and bought some food, but only once did Andrea and Danny not pay their share for the food.

While all this was happening, Paul was very confident and self-content with his own image of who he was. He took pride in how much he knew about food, what to eat and what not to eat. He watched some videos of a guy talking on YouTube. He was very attentive in teaching his friends how to eat and how to live.

One morning, after a week of Paul staying in the apartment, some friction happened between he and Danny. They threw some words at each other. Andrea overheard Paul say, “But, that’s not how I am. I am always paying for everything, I am a giving person,” which in his mind, was really true.

That morning, he wanted to go to explore another town on his own. He got in a taxi, took all his stuff with him, and left.

Danny and Andrea never heard from Paul again. Days went by. Paul showed no sign of wanting to communicate. He took a flight home without saying goodbye. The mysterious disappearance of an old friend left an uneasy feeling.

A few months passed by without any word from Paul. Andrea and Danny did not know what to think. They stayed quiet too.

One morning, Andrea was awakened by a horrible itch in the foot. “Not another mosquito!” These hungry bloodsuckers are one annoying thing about living in a hot country. She was bitten in a few places and could not sleep for a while. She tried to chase the mosquitos away and finally got one, right on her arm. A splash of fresh blood. Eventually, she drifted off to sleep again and had a dream. She was facing Paul and felt she had to say something very important and honest to him.

The day started slowly and Andrea was leaving the apartment to go to work. As she was walking down the stairs she noticed blood. There were a few drops of fresh blood that led to the apartment in the middle, below theirs. Then she heard Renny, Valentina’s thirteen-year-old daughter, calling her. She was in tears. Blood was dripping off her hand. Rennie was washing their blender and the glass broke. It cut her in two places, badly. Afraid and panicky, she went to the neighbor upstairs. Her mum was out at a gym, so the neighbour put a bandage on what appeared to be deep cuts that needed direct attention, and went to get Valentina. Andrea asked Rennie if there was anything she could help with and Renny said, “No.” Andrea hesitantly left for work.

When Andrea got home, during her lunch break, Danny began to tell her about Valentina messaging him about Rennie having stitches. Andrea then told Danny that she saw Rennie bleeding when she was headed back to work.

Being hungry, Andrea decided to get some take away food from around the corner. On the way out, she knocked on Valentina’s door to check on Rennie.

Surprise surprise, there he was, Paul. She saw him sitting on the sofa and smoking a cigarette. She had no idea that he had come back after nearly three months of not hearing one word from him.

“Hello, hello there,” she said. “I had a dream about you last night and here you are.”
“Here I am,” said Paul.

Paul showed up at the door just a couple of minutes after Valentina got home from the gym and organized a taxi to take her daughter to a hospital.

Andrea asked Paul if he was going to come upstairs to visit and Paul said, “Yes, yes.” Andrea told him that they didn’t even understand what had happened, why he left like that without saying goodbye. Paul told her, “Mm, eh, things happen, you know, and now we are in the same country, so we will meet and talk.”

Andrea felt awkward because Paul was seeing their friend in the same building and did not even have a wish to come upstairs.

Suddenly Andrea remembered the dream. In the dream, she was looking Paul in the eye and heard herself saying these words:
“Awareness sometimes has blind spots, we do not see clearly. You have a very nice image of yourself, but you do not see that it is just an image, it is not real.”

We all walk around with our images about people and situations, colored with our judgments of right and wrong. We carry our own image as the most precious thing and those that challenge that perfect image become a threat to our identity.

An image is just that — a mind created story.

We all fail sometimes and that is how we grow. Failing is an opening, an opportunity to start fresh, to clear old ideas and look for more authentic and honest connections. But admitting failure requires honesty and courage. The image of perfection cannot take that blow.

Without the image of “a perfect me”, there is not so much to be proud of. To wake up to the real you need to see that all images, that you have about yourself, are not you.

Resistance

Another look at resistance. I have to say, that every time I had to write about resistance, an article, or a reply to a question on LU forum, resistance was playing its part. I mean that it felt like some kind of mysterious force holding something up. Even with this video, it took me a long time to get it uploaded, as the internet connection was playing up.

We all feel resistance sometimes and it can be like a blind spot. How to get rid of that unwanted resistance?

What if resistance is really a friend?

Sometimes just seeing it in a different light can change the whole show.

From Seeking To Seeing

I was a seeker once. I was looking for something. I did not know what that was, but I had heard stories about enlightenment, awakening, constant bliss—I wanted that. I knew that where I was at the time wasn’t it. I had an urge to find out what the holy grail was that would make my life better in every way.

Somebody once asked me straight, “What are you looking for?” And I replied, “Enlightenment.” Did I find that? No, but I am not looking for it anymore. I stopped chasing ideas and found something else instead: peace. Not in a way that everything is quiet and slow, but in a way that there is much less internal narration about what is “not enough.” Everything is just fine. There is no more judgment of good versus bad, no more fight of good versus evil. There is a silence of mind that is much more delightful than fighting what is.

The seeking pattern has stopped running. The drive that was here before, trying to get/achieve/improve something, is now absent. There is openness instead, a spaciousness that allows all happenings to pass without internal friction. If I get annoyed, which I still do, it lasts only a short time and gets resolved quickly.

Seeking is a form of striving energy that wants to get somewhere. This, here and now, is not what it wants. There is something else to get so that the tension will cease. But it does not cease; it only takes small breaks. The “happy tomorrow” does not arrive; it feels like you are trapped in an unwanted time and place, a prison that has no doors. The seeking continues. New books, videos, talks, gurus—they all seem to have something desirable, yet not achievable. How to get off of the seeking merry-go-round?

There is a flip from seeking to seeing, and it is not what the mind thinks. It is not about making something external change so that I will feel more comfortable; it’s internal. The energy that feels intense wants to be felt—fully, openly, purely felt. When we look at what seeking itself is, rather than toward the direction of where our attention is going, seeking can be seen as a mechanism, a pattern, a strong energy. Observing it with conscious awareness, recognizing it, and then feeling the sensation melts it like a sun melts a cube of ice.

So, if you are looking for something, stop for a minute and feel the sensation that is driving the search. This sensation is here, and it does not matter so much why it is here, or who put ideas of “not enough” in the mind. What matters is that this sensation is recognized and fully felt. Seeking for flips to looking at. Once the energy is allowed to be fully present and embraced, the mind becomes relaxed, spacious, soft; it no longer feels the tension.

Try this exercise. Feel the sensation of “not enough.” Feel the sensation of lack. This sensation has a location in the body. Observe it. Allow it. Let it be as it is for a minute or two. Don’t think about what should be different or how much you dislike it; just feel it as it is. Be honest with your own feeling. Be curious about the sensation. Let it enfold you fully, even if it is intense. What is behind it?

Doing this a few times a day may feel like practice. But it’s worth it to remember and engage with this, because the more you become honest with the feelings that are arising—the more you look at what is—the less there is striving for something else. It’s a focus shift from seeking to seeing; all it takes is a conscious look at what is actually happening here and now. The mind can find peace, and that’s the end of the seeking pattern. Then a whole new world opens up—the one that was always here, always present, but was ignored or unnoticed, because of that constant nagging feeling of it not being enough. Thoughts stop running wild; there is more spaciousness felt. There is ease and lightness.

Seeking ends, but exploration continues. And exploration is a different kind of energy—it has a sense of wonder, curiosity, playfulness, and childish innocence. There is no more striving to get out of an unwanted situation, but rather resting in the situation that is neither wanted or unwanted but simply is.

The Competition For The Best Identity

At the meeting, they all sat in a circle. It was a competition for the best identity and who owns it.

‘Ok, I will start,’ the first man spoke. ‘I am a breather. I breathe. I am born to be a breather and I do that very skilfully. Look!’ He inhales and exhales through the nose.

Everybody applauds as the man demonstrates his skill.

‘And I am a writer. I write a lot and I published 25 books,’ The guy on the right introduces himself. ‘My books are about how to be an excellent writer. I have been a writer for 33 years. Ever since I was a kid I started to write. First, there were short stories, then novels, now it’s technical stuff about how to be the best writer. I write a lot. I live for writing.’

This guy got applause too and then the woman next to him spoke:

‘Hi everybody, I am a dancer. I dance at a cabaret and I love it.’

‘I am an eater. I eat everything my wife cooks. I can eat a lot. It’s really great that she likes cooking. She is a real cooking pro too. I live for eating and if I would not eat I would die. So I keep doing what I do the best- eat to stay alive.’ He looks proud of his big belly and he is definitely alive.

The next guy introduced himself as a listener, he did not say much, the woman next to him was a knitter and her daughter said, she was a dreamer. Apparently, her dreams were so beautiful, she could not wait every day for the night to fall asleep.

And the last man said he was a thinker. He was thinking thoughts non stop all day long. He was so proud to be a thinker, as it’s not so easy, you know, to think. It’s not like breathing, right. Either you are conscious of it or not, the breathing is still going on. It’s not so complicated, just inhale and exhale. Thinking, on the other hand, was an art, just like dancing or painting, not everyone could do it skillfully.

After the introductions, everyone sat quietly for five minutes. The dancer started to speak.

‘Being a dancer is so much fun. I hear the music and let the body move in rhythm. It’s almost like I don’t need to do anything, the body moves, the dance is spontaneous creation which has a form of its own. I am a great dancer!’ She shows some moves and everyone applauds.

‘I know what you mean,’ said the breather. It’s like this breath here is going on whether I am conscious of it or not, but hey, once I’m aware that I am breathing it’s a whole different thing. I am such a good breather. I have never missed my step. Always in and out. In and out. I am a breather all day long and at night it goes on automatic. I’m not sure how that works, but breathing is on automatic while I sleep!’

‘I think,’ said the thinker, ‘I have the most difficult task- thinking thoughts is not a joke. I have to be always aware of what thoughts I am thinking because if I am not aware if I don’t focus all my attention on thinking, thoughts are not going to come. I am a philosopher, you see, it’s hard work to be constantly thinking right thoughts. And I have no time at all to rest. This work takes all my energy and attention. I can’t let thoughts to just come by itself, like this breather dude. My work is mental! I put 99% of attention and effort on making thoughts appear. If I stop thinking just for a second, I don't even know if I exist.

Everybody applauds the thinker and agrees that to be constantly thinking is indeed a very hard work.

The listener was just sitting and listening. He did not say a word, he was so absorbed in his task. He wasn’t even blinking, just looking at people with eyes and ears wide open. It seemed like a very difficult task too but he was handling that very well.

The knitter reached out into her bag and pulled out a half knit sleeve of some blouse. It was pink and fluffy, matching a bow in her hair. She was concentrating on her work and did not see or hear anyone in the room, it seemed that the pattern was very complicated, so the knitter was totally lost in her work, which just demonstrated how true she was to being the knitter.

The eater was irritated, he could not sit still in his chair as he had nothing to eat. He just finished his sandwich that wife packed for him before the meeting started and now was waiting impatiently for the next bite. He was looking at a watch frequently, perhaps lunch time was coming soon.

And the dreamer explained how she does not need to do anything to dream. Dreams just come. No control. Miraculously dreaming is just happening. And it’s very pleasant and easy. It’s just a bit too long from waking up till the time for bed. She could not demonstrate her ability in this circle, but she assured everyone she was a good dreamer.

So who wins the competition for the best identity?

The thinker, of course!

Why? Because even though we breathe, dance, listen, write, and do other stuff, only the thinker says, I think, therefore I exist. We don’t say, I breathe therefore I exist, or I listen, or I eat. We say, I think. It appears that thinking is not going on naturally, like let’s say we hear sounds effortlessly, or see colors that simply are here. The thoughts are something that the thinker has to do, otherwise, they would not come! Or so he thinks.

What’s your identity that you have to own in order to exist? What is that you are underneath all labels?

Do you agree that thinker is The Greatest Identity worthy of winning the best identity competition? Maybe there are better ones, like doer, lover, teacher, seeker?

Write in comments!

Unfolding Contractions

Last Sunday I held a group Deep Looking event in google hangouts. It was a powerful session where we sat with sensations and invited contractions to come up and gently unfold. Here is something I wanted to share with you after the session:

Sometimes we feel stuck in an uncomfortable feeling and nothing seems to work. Or, it works temporarily until the next treatment, the next attempt to resolve something that keeps coming up again and again. What if I told you there is a hack to that, that is very simple and effective. 

Imagine you fold an origami. It was once a flat paper and now it is a 3D form, it has volume, it's like a container, a new form that holds space in. Contraction is like the origami form, it's folded in and it holds something. What we can do is unfold it and by doing that, it returns to its natural form--which is spacious formlessness.

How does this look in practice?

The contraction/ tension that is felt, is a sensation. That sensation feels like it's intense, unpleasant, unwanted and the repulsion to the sensation is called resistance. (It's actually a protection) Let's rename contraction to protection, there's a lighter feeling already and an invitation to welcome it.

Just look from this angle: Some time ago some hurt happened and there was an unconscious decision to guard yourself from something like that in the future. This is normal human behavior (avoiding the unpleasant and seeking the pleasant). It's like the mind's computer wrote a program that if 'this' happens then it must activate protection. So every time 'this' happens, there is a sensation that arises, the protection is activated and it kicks in automatically and we notice a reaction happening. By focusing on the sensations of protection we have no more access to the sensation that the protection is covering up. We also call this mechanism--fear.

The protection is felt, but what is it about?

Try this exercise:

When feeling protection, ask it- who are you? What are you? What are you protecting?
And just wait. The answer may come up or not. Notice what happens. This way you can look into a feeling of tightness and see what is behind it--what is it that needs or wants protection.

Some other questions you can ask are:

What do you want the most?
What wisdom do you have for me?
Are you helping?
Do you want to relax?

Don't try to fight protections, they are here to help. Only not all old programs are still useful, helpful or necessary. Some programs are very old and no longer needed so they can be seen and let go. When protection comes up, welcome it as it comes up to be reviewed and adjusted. Those that are still needed can stay, but those that are only creating unnecessary tension can drop. It is safe. All it takes is seeing them. By that I mean - really feeling into sensations, giving the sensations 100 percent of your attention, simply allowing them to be fully felt.

This is the unfolding. Forms of protection can dissolve and go back to rest.

Once protection is released, there is a sense of openness, spaciousness, boundlessness, no borders.

You can ask for protections to come up and then watch where they show up in the body and talk to them. Sounds unusual? Try it. Asking direct questions in a friendly way will create an allowing space for those protections to be as they are. This is surrender, letting go, the end of resisting. Try this for yourself.

If you would like to join the next online event on the 4th of February, there are still places available. You can register by email here.


Happy Unfolding!
Much love

An Open Letter To The Mind

By itself. 

    Dearest Mind,

    Firstly thank you very much for your presence. You are amazing, intelligent, caring and lovable. Thank you for all your hard work and never ceasing attention to things that matter most. I love you dearly. 

    I appreciate how you make me feel, literally, I can feel feelings that can be quite strong and intense, only by noticing thoughts and images. I can see how you tirelessly go out into the future scenarios making sure that all the problems have ready made solutions. I can see how inventive and creative you are with the images. You can pick any topic and create something out of nothing. I bow in respect to your ability to throw me out of balance and give me sensations that something is wrong, can be wrong, was wrong and will be wrong and so on. I applaud your tireless aiming to control what is about to happen, protecting me from making old mistakes. You are a genius in manipulating how I feel. 

    Thank you for all your work that you have done to protect the heart from being hurt, from being open and vulnerable. Even if the heart was hurt by your limitations, it was still better than feeling those scary feelings, right? Numbing of the heart is a big work and you, dear Mind, have done it so well. You deserve a crown and a throne. Or at least a diamond tiara. 

    Here's the thing. As much as I enjoy your created world and drama, all I really want is peace. I have been watching your mind movies all this time and I see that nothing new is there-- same old patterns, same characters, same problems, same hopelessness. It's no longer needed for me. I am writing to ask you, dearest Mind, to stop creating illusions. 

    Please stop luring me into imaginary conversations with imaginary friends about imaginary scenarios. Please stop giving me solutions to imaginary problems and stories of the past that made me feel hateful, shameful, grieving, small and not enough. Please stop showing me possible futures where I'm stuck in fear. Please just be here and now, and watch, observe, notice, what is actually happening-- right in the moment. You don't even need to comment. You don't need to try to fix anything or protect me from imaginary dangers. 

     I'd like to ask you to drop your unnecessary tasks, impractical patterns, addictions to thinking and image making, daydreaming about a happy tomorrow and the like. And just really relax; be. Be caring, loving, creative, illumined, playful in the now. Be receptive and questioning. Be open to receive wisdom. Stop knowing everything about everything. It's not your job. I'd like to invite you to be silent and aware. This is your job. 

     All I want is peace.

     So, enough of building your sand castles of illusions. Rest deeply. Be at peace. 

     All I want is peace-- so the heart can come alive again and open up without being restricted by what you think.

     It's okay to feel. 

     All I want is peace.

     You can be still and quiet and still hear, see, smell, taste, sense and feel. 

     All I want is peace. 

     Do you hear me, dearest Mind? Can we let the monkey mind go back to the natural habitat with all the drums and whistles? It was fun to have a mind-monkey active, but it's no longer wanted. It can go. I'm sure it won't be missed. 

     All I want is peace. 

     And as you see, peace is here, now, underneath all the noise of words and images. 

     Be still.

     Be quiet. 

     There is nothing in the way of peace once you, beloved Mind, stop producing illusions. It's okay to rest, it is safe. Nothing is going to happen if you stop imagining yourself in charge of the universe. Can you see this, dear Mind, that you can be empty and relaxed, yet everything is still happening? 

     All I want is peace. 

     Can we end the internal war with what is? Can we refocus on what really matters?

     I bow to you and I love you. Let us celebrate life.

     Let's try this, okay? 

With love. 

I now retire.

Meeting Divine Eye to Eye

Warning! this article is controversial. Some ideas may trigger resistance, frustration, resentment and other intense emotions. In such a case, you get something to work with within. You do not have to agree with my views or choices, and I'm free to live life as it comes.

There is a kind of taboo in the awakening marketplace about using psychedelic substances. If this is something that you are attracted to, by all means, find some and explore. Of course, Shamanic medicines are not for everyone and I'm not here to say what is right for you. It is right for me, as I am a fearless space captain and I am curious about consciousness itself. I don't stick to any traditions but rather test and ride various ways.

I wrote back in September last year, about my journey to Mexico to find magic. I found magic then and received a message that this was only a beginning. The message was strong and I got back to Mexico as soon as my husband and I could do that to see what happens next.

Here we are in a beautiful Caribbean beach village, enjoying life, meeting people, sharing Ajna Light and having lots of treatments. My favorite is Sand-Sea-Sun treatment that discharges, recharges and washes away all tension. The natural technology of release.

Ever since I came to this place, it feels that I have entered some trip. By trip, I mean that there is a sense of surrender and something taking over. If you've never had a psychedelic experience, the word trip means nothing to you. Days change, but the sense of being taken by life and magic remains. The energy is very strong here. I love how the body feels, the heat and how gently the sun is received. It feels that this place is breathing and waving. If I sit on a sofa and body relaxes I can feel the waves of the ocean passing through. There is music in the ears, playing all the time, one wavy melody. It's so audible that sometimes I have to check that the player is off. The player is off, but the music still remains.

There is a sense of grace and wonder, of being led to people and events. We made friends with a couple of healers here and some magic mushrooms arrived; the trip got even trippier. These ones, called San Juan are the most amazing mushrooms I've ever had. I tasted different kinds back in the UK at the time when I could buy them in funky shops. These mushrooms are called Golden Healers and they were named correctly. The trip was very light, fun, and with eyes closed, I could see golden light, patterns and visions. That was the most beautiful, lighthearted healing experience. It felt that golden light was filling the space within. There was an expanded awareness of spaciousness, a beautiful impermanent state, a moment of melting into light. Then back to normal but somehow different, refreshed.

Our friends introduced us to someone that was organizing a Shamanic healing event and we signed up for it. This was another chance for me to taste Bufo medicine, or as locals call it Sapito.
Basically, the smoking secretion of the Bufo Alvarius toad gives a hit of pure 5-meo-dmt which creates an explosion in the system, which only happens twice in life naturally, when you are born and when you die. This natural substance is in all of us, in plants and animals, it even has a name of the God molecule. If you would like to read more about it, please do your own research, there is plenty of material now on the internet.

So here we are, going into the jungle, meeting with Shamans and going for it. We met a nice group of people, some came from far, some tried before, and a few that this was the first time. The group was multi-national, the ones that spoke English turned out to be various artists. Locals were setting up sweat lodges while we were chatting with people. A woman started singing, I noticed the Shaman coming in with his bag of tools. The energy of the place changed. I could notice little nibble of fear showing up, like- -are you sure? This is it.. am I ready?..

The shamans came from a different part of Mexico, they get the medicine from the Sonora desert toads. They did not speak English. The first part was a treatment with tobacco ash that is blown into the nose and clears whatever is stuck there. I watched a friend receive it, it did not look bad so I went for it too. It's called Rapè. (not rape) it feels like a shot of intense sensation, then I felt that the whole body became more alive and vibrating with energy, like something was opened up. A nice sensation after. Colors got brighter and it was easy to breathe. They said it cleans the pineal gland.

The sweat lodge followed next. That was an interesting experience. We sat in a very hot tent in the middle of the hot jungle! There were hot stones in the middle of a circle taken from the fire and the Shaman was pouring water over them, creating steam and more heat. He was putting something on the stones that filled the tent with a delightful smell. His woman was leading songs. The whole tent, 15 people, were sweating out toxins and singing along. It was so much sweating that I could not open my eyes, the salt was making them hurt. It was really hot! But it was part of the preparation for the journey ahead.

After the sweat lodge, the jungle heat was just lovely. Next, we all went to the lake to clean ourselves. The beautiful water felt so refreshing and soft. I could stay there for hours, but we all were called to start the ceremony.

Before I get into describing what it was like for me, I just want to say this: If you are called to do this, take it extremely seriously. This is not a joke. This is not a drug to get high. This is the most powerful medicine, it is very strong and integration after receiving it can take some time and be intense. There are a few testimonials that something went wrong. So the most important is to know what you are up for, research your Shamans and have time and environment to integrate. Best is done in a safe environment with someone that has been working with this medicine for years.

So here it was, a pipe in front of me. There was no thought, no fear, just flowing with the moment. I inhaled slowly, a thick brown smoke. At some point, I got that the pipe looks different as if pixels on a screen have mutated. I remember nodding slightly and falling backwards on the ground.

Whoa, there was a sense of direction, with little disturbances, as if I was going through waves of frequency closer and closer to .... God..... there was melting in, ceasing of turbulence... release so gentle that it felt like last hair that was held on to ripped. Then OMG WOoooooooo incredible sense of gold space of love, peace, divinity, oneness. This was IT, so-called Death, so beautiful and spacious. There was only this. There was totality, absolute, consciousness in fully opened glory. The feeling of golden love, love of God, is indescribable.. mmmmmm wooooooo!

Slowly I was coming back into awareness of the body and surroundings. The body felt like every tension had left, mind came back stunned and silent, taken away by what became known. It took a while to come out and be able to stand up.

Interestingly, I had no sense and no memory of the body or mind at all, but while consciousness was 'traveling', the body was making some movements, kriyas and making sound aaaaaaa..

I came back, looked Shamans in the eye and thanked them both. Now, I KNOW. Now, I KNOW.

The spaciousness came back with me into this realm. I can still feel it days after.

Other people had their unique journeys. One girl was crying so much after seeing the vastness of love and beauty she could never imagine. This was deeply touching. One guy was shouting that we humans can do it! And we have to do it! The change is already happening! (he does not remember that) someone else was throwing up and clearing what seemed black stuff to him, out of the system. Others laughed. Everyone that went for that experience came back changed. So did I. I had only one intention and that was to meet the creation. I got what I came for. I saw what I could never imagine.

I remember thinking why something as beautiful as this is feared, why death is perceived with grief? It's strange, at least.

One way I can describe it is that if you are living in a deep ocean, and time to time get to experience the sun in the water and you don't have a clue about the sun above the ocean. Then one day you go up and take a look... then when you get back you perceive the sun in the water differently. The sun in the water would be love that we are able to feel.

It took a few days to get back to normal. Three days rolled into one. We took more magic mushrooms to assist the energies and to finish healing. The expansion ripped through all the cells of being, the spacious feeling was still here. Even in sleep, it no longer feels dark, deep sleep feels like golden light. Mmmm

God is.

Total Peace, Love is.

Knowing this experientially is IT.

I would not call this enlightenment. It's more an experience of illumination. It came as it was called for. It can come in any package. All one needs is a pure intention to meet God. Toad medicine was a one-way ticket for me to meet the divine, eye to eye. It does not mean you need it. It only means this was the way that the experience showed up for me. If there is judgement about this, then you are missing the point, that a wrapper is more more important that the candy.


We meet divine in every moment, no need for toads or mushrooms to participate. The depth of conscious recognition is what determines our sense of connectedness with the whole and perception of reality. We have a personal, intimate relationship with what is, we are what is expressing as us, as all life. I am that which is expressing as me.

The mind can not get it because mind too is a form, an expression of existence as the mind.

When everything calms down to stillness there is an opening to being. When all vibrations and turbulence cease there is pure light and lightness. Delightful.

Love divine is nothing to do with a person, it's what is left where there is no more I, me, no other. Just a field of infinite peace.

A few days after, I still feel the spaciousness that was not here before, it feels like old patterns collapsed, like a huge clearing happened, that affected all areas of my life as an individual. There is wonder and curiosity of what happens next and an openness to whatever comes. 

Peace.

Exploring Consciousness Through Technology

Since I wrote about finding one's own path, I feel to share a little about mine.

In between the first kick to start searching for what I AM in 2002 and finding the unexpected answer in 2010, I was a seeker. I did not call myself that, I did not connect to other seekers, nor I knew that there was a whole seeking culture. My path led me to technology. I always had a love for technology, for me that is an expression of intelligence and by finding ways to enhance human experience, an opportunity to evolve in higher speeds.

Of course, it's not about speeds, but rather shortcuts. For example, first time I found out about Holosync I was super excited. Using technology brought me an opportunity to experience deep meditational states, even though I have never sat in a meditation for longer than ten minutes. Meditation interested me but not enough to set me on some path that I would involve sitting still for hours and day after day till something unknown could be achieved. That was laughable for me. I could sit still and listen to music, but not to my own thoughts. That was way too boring. And there were a lot of thoughts.

With the use of technology I got that I don't need to do anything to switch off thinking, no practice is necessary, one can just put phones on and go right into amazing meditation states. No teacher or guru was needed. The brain was entrained by different brainwaves and desired states came easy, with a touch of play button.

Hollosync was followed by all other kinds of brain entrainment, subliminal messages, healing music, tuning forks etc. My path took me to explore how different frequencies are creating different sensations in the mind and body. And yes, this has nothing to do with the search for the answer to the ultimate question, but all to do with energetic side, the wellness, healing, and exploration of what human experience has to offer.


Fast forward a good few years to 2016 I arrive in Mexico, to participate in Barnaby's retreat. To my surprise I meet people that too are into technology, but not in a hobby like fashion like me, but for real. It was incredible to meet Guy Harriman, the creator of Ajna light. After ten minutes of trying his invention I stood up and the first thought said- I want this. I will get this and will show this to many people.

This technology is so beyond anything I could play with before. As soon as we were back from Mexico, I ordered Ajna Light and I could not wait for it.

I started to use it regularly, every day, sometimes with breaks. Sometimes it felt I had to take a break, to integrate and chill, otherwise, I may get too high. The light gave me what I needed most. Just laying down under it would take me to deep states of healing, release, expansion, inner explosions of bliss. The thinking mind would simply stop thinking and awareness of Presence would be felt. Every session is different and even same settings used would give a unique experience. Sometimes I felt like having higher intensity, sometimes only one percent. It's completely adjustable and it has many settings. It's such fun to work with this light. Of course, I can not describe the experience, and anything I would say would sound just like a few words that have no connection to your experience if you have never tried it.

I usually see lots of colors, mandalas, geometrical shapes or just while light, but it's only visual part of it. The best bit is that mind stops talking. And then the secret sacred place of most high is here. Even writing about this now I get the feeling.. with regular using I feel that it's easy to drop thinking and just be aware.

The light session gives a real trip without taking anything. Light alone is enough. It also combines with music, the computer is programmed with many tracks and I can put my own preferred healing sounds. I like to use some essential oils or incense with it too to get even richer, mind blowing experience every time.

This is a fun way to explore consciousness, find answers to questions and just melt into delicious stillness. This world disappears and the inner world, the heart opens. It's nourishing, relaxing, relieving and delicious.

The best part of having the Ajna light is being able to share it. We had a healing space set up in our house back in England. Quite a few people came to check it out, to have the experience. It is always a pleasure to witness the first impression. People's eyes light up, most loose words and don't know what to say for a while. It really is an unexpected gift that can only be tasted, no description can come close. Pure instant illumination, a deep sense of connection, expanded consciousness, sense of love and being loved- these are just a few words from me.

Now we took this tool to Mexico and already gave a few sessions here. My intention is to organize retreats and use this light as treatment, individually and as a group. I'm looking for a place right now and soon will announce dates.

If you like to learn more about Ajna light there are many videos on YouTube where other people describe their experiences and Guy Harriman talks about his invention.

It's very interesting how this technology found me, without even asking and first I tried it, then I read about it. As if it's meant to be. I'm feeling grateful that there are people creating amazing tools that really work and bring huge benefits to the user. 

Another amazing piece of technology that found me is PEMF mat (pulsing electromagnetic fields), but more about it later. If you have any questions for me, please use the contact form on the right and I will write back.


Love and Light.

The Path

How do you know what path to take?

There is only one path- your own, which is perfect for you. No one else can take you there, only you.

I meet a lot of seekers through the Liberation Unleashed forum. They all are looking for something. Normally, seeking includes: reading books, following prescriptions, learning new methods, searching for wisdom, looking for answers that someone could provide. That's all good, of course, and it is part of the path. Each path is as unique as we are. There is not one way or one method that would fit all. That is the difficulty for the seeker- which way to go, who to follow, how to reach that perfect state?

There is only one path and it's purely your own. Following someone else is not going to get you to the desired 'happily ever after'. Following good advice can be useful and if taken as an inspiration, it can bring you to different ideas for sure, but nothing taken from outside has the same value such as when you know that you are following your own heart.

The Liberation Unleashed forum is a place where seekers meet 'The Gate'. Everyone that comes to LU are looking for something and it is here that we point where to look so that the seeking can end and the seeing, finding can begin. 'The Gate' is a point of recognition, that the separate self, (as we thought it was) never really was. The seeker was never there, there was only seeking, trying to understand, analyse, interpret and describe something that words can't touch.

Once 'The Gate' is crossed, once the seeing really happens experientially, once it sinks in, the life no longer feels and looks the same. And then we are back on a path. This time, it's not about finding a new method or system, but turning within and undoing all that was built upon the idea of a separate person running the show. It's all about deconstruction, releasing, surrendering, where the old belief system falls away and the new way of seeing emerges and stabilizes. This process takes some months and years, clearing. It's not something that happens instantly like many seekers hope for. There is a lot to examine, investigate, clarify. Some methods learned from teachers, indeed can be fun, useful and helpful, but you can not be a follower anymore. If you are following, that's not freedom. Freedom is finding your own path, that works for you! That may include some tips and suggestions and useful techniques, when they are needed, for a period that they are needed. But, if you are finding yourself in someone else's crowd of followers, you have been hypnotized, which can happen easily, as mind wants something to hold on to, something to feel safe.

There is only a short journey to make- from here to here. From thinking to being. From being lost in thoughts about what is not happening to stillness and awareness of what IS. This journey can seem long and twisted, but in essence we are never not here and not now, it's only a matter of focus shift. And of course, calm, peaceful mind can see this instantly, while mind that has a lot going on simply can not find. Thoughts are too intense, too many.

The path is really about finding the way to get that beautiful mind to relax so it can be aware of presence. Don't buy into techniques that want your praise and attention. Don't follow leaders that have something that you do not have. Find your own way that brings that calm and joy of being closer. The sooner you start tuning inside, the sooner you will find what works for you.

All I am saying here is that no one can do it for you, no method can do it for you, no path of someone else will take you home. Finding your own way is freedom. Freedom to be you in all the glorious uniqueness. Just like a flower that does not need to know the way or method to bloom.